Chapter 1: The One Within

Starting something new often feels like stepping into the unknown. It’s a funny thing, that we run away from fear yet sometimes, the fear of the unknown is sometimes what we really need

Sharing this short poem I wrote for a creative writing class in 2022!

The One Within

No matter where I go or what I do

The one within me feels left out

She has an exuberant personality

She jumps when she laughs, shrieks when she cries, and fights back at me when she's infuriated

Constantly in search for my attention

Little does she know, that I’ve trapped her

There is no way for her to get out

No matter how much she jumps, yells, or screams

she cannot escape

She resides in me underneath suffocating layers

which would probably take years to chip away at

She thinks of me as evil

I might be, but that’s okay - she’s too naive for this world

This world where pain has the ability to eat me alive

Pain that enters my mouth and wraps its way around my entire being

Feeling the bitterness on the tip of my tongue, my insides shrivel; it enters but never leaves

Rather I succumb to it so that she can doesn’t have to

because I love her more than anything

I find her in everything I do, despite the urge to forget about her

The twinkle in her eyes

Those chubby cheeks and pigtails

And of course that bright smile

But enough of all of that

Because she is me but I will never be her.

This was the first chapter I just feel like this is captures the core of who I am; a constant push and pull between identities.